So all the ringers seem to have fit in pretty seamlessly on the lanes and hanging out.  They’ve been friendly, dug the vibe, haven’t been TOO dominant.  There is one problem, though…TAPE!  What the hell, guys, why are you throwing little pieces of tape and wrappers all over the floor?  It’s influencing all the BoPo guys and they are now getting tape and following your lead of throwing trash all over the floor.  Just put your trash in a nice little pile, or in a trash can, not on the floor.  If you know any of these tape-litter perps, shame them (or just tell them not to throw trash on the floor).

Oh, and Tuesday all-stars are all set, that’s a baller lineup.  What will Thursday throw at them, seeing as Thursday is defending all-star champs and all?  If you have no idea what I’m talking about, swing by Bayside next Wednesday at 8 and check out the game, it’s a blast.

Game of the Night


#4 Y&B2 (5-0) -1 vs #2 L.O.S. (5-0): Some games earn this title by having interesting subplots, or being old rivalries, but this is the classic version – simply the two best teams on Thursday going at it.  It features seven all-stars (unless somebody Ripcords a 52 to drop out of contention).  Oh, and with current average leader Precious out of town LOS didn’t skip a beat in bringing in Mr. Clean, who should be able to duplicate that average if he can adjust to the BoPo environment.  So, Y&B2, I suggest you amp up that environment.  Shots, dancing, vipers, whatever it takes.  Y&B2 doesn’t need a lot of shenanigans to win, I suppose, with that packed lineup.  Crackerjack is definitely BoPo adjusted, and Glossy Mexican is learning muy rapido.  Mystery Powers is killing it too.  The old schoolers (ITZ, Pistol, Shifter and Mo$) have thus far been able to kind of sit back and let the noobs carry them. They’ll have to aid the cause this week.  Mo $ may be a little distracted with her new role as guest host of Rooftop Sessions.  Shifter will be limping around in the background urging them on, and I think they want it a little more.  Late games, though, they’re crazy.  Y&B2 lives late, LOS doesn’t play there often.  That’s deciding my coin toss.

Early Games

UREA! (2-2) -3 vs Tattoos and Titties (1-3):  I don’t know what to say about this game.  T&T’s season highlight so far may have been when I spelled Julian wrong.  Things haven’t started well with a sub 600 average and a pile of losses.  Rubbys is a divine Diana Ross, however.  UREA! has been getting the old T-$ the last few weeks.  I’m hoping he holds on to it and keep things going.  I’m assuming he’ll roll well enough to get UREA the win here.

Guacabowle (1-3) -1 vs Leisure Rolls (2-3): This is a weird one.  These are two teams that figure to be contending for the Thursday A crown yet they’re both stuck with losing records 5 weeks in.  They’ve both bowled well enough – they have the 3rd and 4th best averages in the division (admittedly after a steep dropoff from 2nd).  I can’t think of a reason to pick for or against either of them in this perfectly even matchup, so I just decided that early somehow favored Guacabowle and made that pick.  Thrilling insight into my picks right there.  “Screw you Hungus! Show us some respect! Proved you wrong!” are some things Magic might yell if his team won and he was not Magic but some person who looked to the lines for motivation.

Lovernauts (2-3) -1 vs Lesbowlians (4-1): The Lesbowlians have maximized their scoring to get close wins and a shiny 4-1 record.  That record will be put to the test against a Lovernauts team that’s had the exact opposite run, doing just enough to lose.  They actually have the top average in the division but find themselves with a losing record.  I figure the odds catch up with both teams in this one.

Spare of the Dog (2-1) -1 vs Cunning Linguists (2-2): Man, so many close looking games!  Why do the Dogs only have three games?  I hope it’s not some schedule fuckup that will show itself in March when it’s too late.  Props to the Dog boys for coming to Bayside on their bye week last week and ordering the Team Dinner special (and for eating an ungodly amount of fried chicken, well done sirs).  Given their team name I think it’s safe to assume Col. Angus’ team likes to eat, too.  They’ll come in to this one hungry.

Late Games

TDYOB (1-3) -5 vs B & B (1-3):  They both have the same record, they both have 28 points, but I don’t think this one will be that close.  TDYOB actually had one of their best games ever in last week’s Munson-less loss to LOS.  They look likely to place three on the all-star squad (though Thunder and Sneaky Pete will miss the game).  B&B probably doesn’t even read lines anymore since it’s so often just about Viking, but that’s just the way this season’s gone.  I’d love to see a huge night from Billy James or Beaujolais or some crazy drunken antics to give me some fresh material.

Lions Den (4-1) -9 vs Granola Bowlahs (0-4): Time to wreck the party pit.  Rick Vaughn left the Granola Bowlahs and they’ve been flailing without him at 0-4.  Things may start getting better though since their captain dropped the bad karma of a duplicate name and is now Kid Loose.  They should actually be psyched to see their old Captain and party together.  No better place than the pit.  Lion’s Den, while bringing the heat in the party rankings, also has a chance to make some noise in B Division.  A 5-1 record at the halfway point would be pretty nice.

DHD (4-0) -9 vs Bad News Spares (1-3): I know it’s a little early to be thinking about division titles, but look at DHD’s next three weeks.  Three straight winless teams.  They should probably be 7-0 for a March showdown with Lovernauts.  Not bad!  The Spares are on the upswing this year, and they are good enough now to steal a few points from the top teams (the practice is paying off!), but I’d be shocked if they top 5 points.

Pinny Candy (3-2) -9 vs Pud’s Taxi (0-4): Pud’s Taxi got some sweet new unis, but I am planning to rock my old school Pud’s gear to watch tonight’s game.  They also grabbed 3 points last week and were pretty pumped.  I’m going to give them 3 more here in this prediction.  Pinny Candy hasn’t really gotten in gear yet but after tonight they’ll be sitting at 4-2 and that’s not a bad start.

Happy Hands (3-2) -1 vs Roll Another (4-1): This might be the only late match that goes to three games.  Roll Another is off to a fast start but I feel like we’ve seen this before, and they’ll start losing ones they’re favored in and pull off a couple upsets once we write them off.  They make predicting very difficult.  Happy Hands still has a really solid team and could contend for the division title but they need this one.  They’ve also given us some new league nicknames following their script, with Crackerjack being Barney Munjoy and Double Cheese as Shadow Adams.  Hell I may even start rolling as Roscoe Riverside with my new hair.





5 thoughts on “Litterbuggin’

  1. Is there a trash can around? I always feel bad even just leaving my tape in a nice neat pile on the table for someone else to clean up, who knows how long I’ve been rubbing my greasy thumb on those things before I pulled them out. but I’ve never been able to find a trash can when I look for one.

  2. Working on procuring a private jet if we both make the squad land right before things kick off head out right after the AS game.

    1. Ok bopo, who’s up for pooling money together to lease all the private jets on the Eastern Seaboard? E-minor, use your piloting connections, Senator ITZ, convene the Senate, Tush Christ, pray to your Father? Tampon Santa……alright I just wanted to type Tampon Santa, but do something if ya can.

      1. Tampon Santa is building a sled made of Diapers that is going to be pulled by Flying Cotton Ponies.

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