Techno(phobe) Tuesday

Yes, I’m an old fart.  Yes, I have tape over the camera on my computer.  I also had my work elevator tapped by the FBI (which led to a hilarious conversation when the receiver started transmitting and the elevator asked me to speak with Agent Stevens before abruptly cutting out when I said ‘This is an elevator!’) but that’s not unusual when you work at ACLU headquarters.  I am baffled that people are spending money to bring Google and Amazon listening devices into their house, pay extra to have computers in their car and add onstar (passive listening) and hum (location tracking more intrusive than that on your phone) and the like, and that people are voluntarily getting phones with facial recognition just so they can make an animated pile of shit sing.  So it is no surprise that when I’m reading articles on line I enjoy text – I skip over links with video.  That said, Statler fired some shots on the last podcast about written lines, so just to prove an old Luddite can play that game…

Here’s Statler and Waldorf pre-gaming (Munson is Steve)

Early Lines

Binga’s (1-1) -11 vs Spare of the Dog (0-1): Today’s crossover features a team that played for one season on Tuesday, and didn’t really think much of it.  They are a fashion first team, and Mona had this to say about Tuesday stalwart Binga’s who they play tonight

For Binga’s, it’s back to back early games.  This is Jerk responding to Hungus’ reminding them to show up on time.

Oddballs (1-0) -1 vs Body English (0-2):  BEER’s claim to fame is having the highest average in the league while still being winless.  Here they are leaving the lanes after last week’s loss

The Oddballs will be the latest team to enjoy the comfortable vibes of playing BEER and should average 800.  Twisted Tea keeps talking belly shirts.  This is him after tonight’s game

O.C. (1-1) -1 vs S.O.D. (2-0): O.C. looked like it might have been facing another season of reminiscing about the good old days, like Tron seen here

Then they came out of nowhere to knock off Saucy Posse.  Maybe the good times are back?  Mama D is helping the boys harness the varsity intensity.  S.O.D. is off to a hot start of their own with new addition Couch and some impressive rolling from The Dentist.  This is them determining who gets to bowl anchor.

Wrecking Balls (1-1) -1 vs Ball That (1-1): Ball That expected an easier ride down in B but got a rude awakening last week.  Samsquampch and Gutterlicious have redoubled their Harry Potter inspired training to get back above .500

Wrecking Balls seem to have made an excellent signing in Iceberg.  He could help expand the horizons of The Wreck and lead them to a land they’ve only dreamed of

Bowl Trolls (2-0) -13 vs Whoomp (0-2): The Trolls mean business this year.  They’ll take some time between modeling shoots to pick up another win tonight against the loveable Whoomp.  The Trolls’ preseason signing of Gutterslut  is working out well.  Here’s video of how Fuge almost signed someone else before the season.

Late Games

Strikes on Tap (2-0) -1 vs Incredibowls (1-1): The Incredibowls are off to a solid start given their loss of Spidey.  They bounced back from their NED loss with a big win next week.  Now they play upstarts Strikes on Tap, a team that has been fairly anonymous and quiet.  Then they got better, and added Cleveland.  Here’s Cleveland responding to Boston during pregame handshakes.

 

Saucy Posse (1-1) -2 vs Yahtzee (1-0): Somehow the 2016 champs are flying under the radar.  Maybe it’s Tango’s injury.  Whatever the reason they probably like it that way.  A win tonight might change things though.  It’s always a big deal when the last two champs play.  Unfortunately for Yahtzee, SauPo is coming off a loss and hungry for redemption. I’m hoping (of course) for a bowloff, and to see the new bowloff rules go into effect.  Here’s Hot Sauce responding to the bowloff rule change

Sharks and Strikes (0-2) -1 vs Turkey Club (1-1): I guess I’m going to just start picking against Turkey Club now.  I never get them right.  I do know Sharks is due, and Dick Du Jour is on fire, only one spot behind Ripcord in the stats.  Sharks get the win, then Railroad steals the show in their postgame celebration (DDJ having his own party in the back of the formation)

 

 

 

N.E.D. (2-0) -7 vs BILF (1-1): N.E.D. has something of a B powerhouse on their hands after signing the top dog from their biggest rival.  Here’s their preseason training montage

Here’s BILF’s (Old Thumper and Major Danks)

I’ll take the guys with thunder in their hearts.

Skol (2-0) -5 vs Hazzard (0-2): It.s been an amazing week for Viking.  He’s 2-0 in his first season as captain, then saw his football squad pull off one of the great playoff miracles of all times.  I’m pretty sure he’s out of town for this one, but that just means three games for a motivated Tommy Gunz.  Meanwhile, there’s real trouble in Hazzard county.  Rev Lord is off to a slow start and LB looks lost without his life partner Herb’n Legend.  Here’s Uncle Jesse’s season so far (good news is they face BEER next week)

Budweisers (2-0) -13 vs Three Livers (0-2): Big mismatch on the lanes.  Luckily they have another competition lined up for after the match, which will be much more evenly matched and go down something like this

 

Alright, that’s it, I’m exhausted…good luck Tuesday.  Oh, and Mo is back, so look for me doing this