A couple quick notes before Farmer’s lines…April PBA ticket sale still on, get all 3 nights for $30. Also,DJ Jon will be dj for the championship match on April 27. Now on with the lines.
Sad that I missed a week of BoPo and couldn’t do the lines last week, but I will try to redeem myself with both solid bowling intel and NSFW videos for you all this week.
For those who like to laugh, an old-school podcast was just recorded last weekend, and from what I remember I think at least some of you will enjoy it. #sistersquad
I get the early matches this week, and I will start with a Thursday A Match of the Week:
LOS (-1) v. Guacabowle – Prognosticating about LOS is a crap shoot. You never know who will be in attendance, but if it’s their A team look out. Guacabowle has a lot of bowlers as well, and right now Dick Whitman is on the outside looking in for their playoff roster (podcast trivia). Cilantro has the 4 spot now, so Dick has to stop rolling 106’s and start rolling some 156’s to get things back on track. And knowing he will miss a match later this month for his delayed ski trip means he is running out of weeks to make it happen.
Putt Putt Pass is still holding onto the top Thursday average. He must think we are all a bunch of hacks out here (he’s right) and that he is some type of bowling savant (he isn’t) to be sitting atop the Thursday stats. Double Cheese would love to pass him in average, but I am sure he is happy to have such a strong newbie on the squad, especially given Stiffy’s struggles. Precious will miss some time soon with a new baby on the way, so I bet he will be there to get in as many games as possible before he has a small hiatus for diaper duty.
Dick Whitman’s struggles can be traced back to the time he tried to get some Xanax for his long flight to Utah for that infamous delayed ski trip…worth the few minutes.
GOB (-5) v. Leisure Rolls – I would have had this line a lot closer if we hadn’t played Leisure Rolls last week. Wow, what’s going on with that team? It’s like their house is on fire, and here is what they are doing about it:
Ummm, gents (and ladies), you are supposed to evacuate, not bring your teammates up a ladder and into the fire…wtf? Side note, pretty creative, sorta dark, but ultimately a funny video.
Dutch has 5 200’s. The rest of the team combined has 1. The things you learn on the podcast will amaze and astound you! That seems like a problem. They would need more big games from more bowlers (Magic, looking at you, dude) to get by GOB.
Holden is in line to make some money this season. He went 129 133 last week, but if he can weather the bad weeks and keep his average in the 170’s, he’ll be fine. But I do worry what he might do with the winnings to his boys Squeaky G and Street Sex:
BUI (-7) v. Spare of The Dog – Sometimes you get an easy match to predict. And let me be 100% clear when I say Spare of the Dog will have the most fun in this match. And BUI will crush them.
Duke Thunderwood is again pacing BUI, with Snapshot, G-Unit and Whiskey Pete all a touch below their averages of yesteryear. But even with that, they will have more than enough to take care of a win tonight. And guys, don’t take lady advice from Snapshot:
At least now we know what he’s reading up on the rooftop.
Weird scene with Yao Romo at the team dinner tonight for Spare of the Dog:
Roll Another (-3) v. Strike City – I am feeling pretty confidentabout this one, especially after witnessing this conversation between Magnus and The Brush earlier:
Speaking of The Brush, add him to the long list of people who are “working with Jimmy”. Looks like it’s working, so we should all start to see some bigger scores from him. Now if we could only get the rest of the team to buy some bowling balls and shoes…I mean, you make $4 walking in the door if you have your own shoes!
Roll Another was at the lanes Sunday getting in some work, they want to have a strong second half to the season and they get the win tonight. The Package and Uncle Buck are leading the team this season and tonight will lead them to victory.
ICBING (-13) v. Bad News Spares – Bowl Portland’s only unbeaten team will have little trouble in this one. And we may even see another roll between the legs from Peanut Gutter! Last week he opened with 7 strikes, then 2 opens. He spared the tenth and rolled his bonus ball between his legs. Probably his best shot of the night, the ball hooked into the pocket for a solid 9. Pretty much a result that anyone on Bad News Spares would take on their first ball.
ICBING is continuing to bring the party as well, and last week the wife-beater t-shirts with graphics of a naked hairy male chests (and backs) on them were quite a sight. Especially on Handy. Here are Rocky Balbowla and Handy coming home from dinner, only to be accosted by Peanut Gutter and 2 Dogs:
Urea! (-3) v. Happy Hands – What happened to HHP? They were cruising earlier in the year, and now they are not even in the top 5 to make a B playoff spot. Urea! started slow, had a ton of random subs, and now they seem to be finding their groove. Give me the team who’s hot over the team’s that not. Every time.
A lot of you may not know the HHP crew, but here’s a little insight into them from a pub crawl the team did a couple weeks ago:
HHP….they’re just like us!
And remember, tomorrow night another great show at Baysideby The Perceptionists. A live band backing a couple great socially conscious hip hop artists from Boston? Count me in! Bayside has been killing it lately with Blackalicious a couple weeks ago and The Samples last weekend. How great is it that Bayside Bowl is becoming one of the best music venues in town?
Did you know the PBA will be here a month from tomorrow?