Well here we are. Congrats to all the teams that made it this far. To us that didn’t let’s freaking party tonight and Saturday then get the F out for awhile and dry the hell out. Thunder hitting 30 day cleanse starting Sunday/Monday depending if hair of dog needed after Bowling Ball. First five days of shakes and withdrawals are awful, and that first weekend with no booze is truly terrible, once you get passed that it’s all good in the hood. Here I am Monday evening:
My God that’s a one and done movie, not one you watch a ton! Let’s get cracking on the Quarters we got 4 tight matchups, I would be shocked if they didn’t all go 3.
Oddballs 8 Saucy Posse 7: Oddballs barely beat a team destined for the B finals and Nugget had their only 200. The Thunder curse looms large over these cats, but something says they bring it against Saucy tonight. Saucy has been up and down this season and on paper they match up well. I’m not making this pick with a lot of confidence, but these are two teams very familiar with bowling against each other for years and neither will turtle. Both will bring the heat and I expect it to go down to game 3 tenth frame, if it doesn’t that means Oddballs didn’t show got blown out in two. All these matches are tough. Nut Sauce is a Queenshit, but Fart Nugget can hang with her. Then there are dude aces on all sides. HBK and Twisted T need to step the hell up and bowl like they can tonight, if they do not here they are after the match:
GOB 9 versus Average Bros 6: This is how this match will go:
Team of the year GOB seems to be destined for the semis, THURSDAY MATCH in the house!!!! Average Bros are lucky to be here. They need a calm and locked in Fisher Price tonight. Clean shaven South Paw will bring the heat, but will he get help? Soccer Dad, Dentist and North Paw have been erratic to say the least and they have barely survived two B teams to get there. If Dentist, SP and SC get hot at the same time GOB is in trouble, but it hasn’t happened all year and early is no joke on this bullshit pattern. We get another pattern like this here is Hungus after opening night:
Hungus is the dog!
Back to the match Team of the Year candidate, if Hungus paid any attention, aren’t phased by this and in fact I got a text from Hand yesterday guaranteeing this win but stating semis would get dicey. Bold technique guaranteeing a win like that. Guys been at Howie’s till 1:00 a.m. every Thursday since January his brain has turned to mush. Speaking of mush brains Holden had to hold it down during regular season but seems to be crawling to the finish line, dude needs A game tonight. Seatown is an absolute killer on the lanes, her ball has looked great all season long and she is a clutch playoff bowler. Lil Bit may not get a game tonight, depending how this goes, but she is a team first kind of lady and will be at the postgame regardless. I mistook Squeaky G for a kid with a beard at a charity event on Monday night while smashing his team in a Baker game, sorry about that again bro, and Jon Moon is your calm and collected veteran ready when name called, keeping squad chill and with sage advice. This has been the year of GOB I see them punching that semis ticket. Whether they do or don’t hear are hand and Holden end of the evening:
Wow maybe those dudes should have apologized to a clean shaven South Paw. Speaking of South Paw here are he and his brother with the other brothers on the team after the match:
Wow those parties in Cape are off the chain.
BEER 8 versus LOS 7: The Doctor can admit when he is wrong. Team of Destiny BEER got by everything. Slow sucked it up big time and took $20 off the doctor going something like 105, 140, 167 and powering BEER through with a broken elbow to end the Gunz revenge tour part Deuce! Can she go six tonight? Not sure, but she can go three and take low from the LOS ladies who didn’t crack 127 against TDYOB. Herb had a 277 and Railroad a 289, no one has ever questioned their firepower, but tonight they have more to overcome. Brandy is still out due to an extremely stiff neck, do not make her turn to talk to you, address her head on we are talking major spasm here, think:
Brandy is Lurch in that video.
LOS is absolutely loaded, their top 3 guys, Stiffy’s season is over after losing to Thunder 142-131, can match up with anyone in the league. They had an 87 and beat TDYOB 4-1 behind a 222, 218, 195, they are extremely good. Precious is a clutch bowler who is driven to win, Cheese puts in more work than anyone and take this serious as hell, and Putt Putt Pass is the rookie of the year and may be the ace right now. Cheese even went and got a dog Tuesday, so Strike Dancer had to stay home. That is being committed to the craft right there. No offense Patriot fans. Everything points to LOS winning this match. This also says LOS: Herb N Legend has a house closing or some shit and can only make game 3 if lucky and that means three for Hungus and Railroad and Hungus needs to be Hungus 240 not Hungus 170 and Ricky Vaughn after sitting out round of 16 and Filthy will have to be clutch as hell, and you know what? They both will be. I’ve battled with these dudes on the fields and on the lanes and they always, and I mean always, show up. Rick Vaughn goes 230 Ricky V tonight brings the energy carries Brooklyn causes LOS big three to have an aneurysm Herb shows and they pull this out. I just have a feeling about BEER, that said wouldn’t be surprised if LOS smashes them in 2. These are not easy matches to pick as there are 8 heavyweights left well except for Average Bros and GOB those are just two teams looking to get killed in the semis. If BEER does lose here is Hungus after the match:
Chill out bro you are Northwestern they are Gonzaga you were supposed to lose. If LOS falls here, they are after the match:
Talk about party machines.
I don’t know how to tackle this next one, it has been the year of the Shark, but they are known for choking in the playoffs and almost did it again Tuesday night, but White Russian kept them afloat. XXX Club advanced literally by one pin in total. Decisions to decisions.
Sharks 9 versus XXX Club 6: Hungus had some good points. These Sharks were “dead in the water” then they got “let off the hook”, these cats were so uptight about losing round 2, as always, now that they finally made it out of it they relax and crush. White Russian bailed these cats out big time on Tuesday now Cheddar, Ten Pin and DDJ shred. XXX Club has been in SB hangover mode all season. They just almost lost to three of the oldest guys in the league in G Force, Doc Moose and S Kingpin and now they battle and bow down to the better team. Zero love lost between these teams expect a huge battle and maybe a DDJ right hook across Jim Tom’s face. Here is Herk after the game:
Now literally my least favorite thing to do, hypothetical BS lines about matches that may not happen:
Sharks 8 GOB 2: The year of Thursday ends on a Thursday I give GOB a 0% chance to beat Sharks and am being nice because I love that crew by giving them two points. They don’t have the fire power to beat a Sharks team that has been on a mission all year.
BEER 10 versus Oddballs 5: Team of Destiny beats an Oddballs team that has been sliding by via the skin of their teeth all season.
Keep eyes peeled for 2 v 2 and B Finals and BoPo finals lines posted on Saturday. Yo it’s Thursday night you got nothing better to do, let’s fill up perv row and get weird, we don’t do this shit just for the PBA, we just give them what we have been giving ourselves for 12 years. Long live BoPo!