Thursday B we need someone to step up and do your lines as Doc and Hungus are super busy. If interested email me at email@example.com. Yes, I am old. Okay Boomer. Hungus got work stuff. Doc work stuff, and heading to Florida tomorrow so neither had much time; apologies, for throwing these together last minute.
B&B and FC Portland on a bye, leading to less fun:
Farmer went with Valentine lines, Sneaky and Doc don’t do hallmark holidays, but I will try and jump in.
Early (AKA The Morgue):
Pinny Candy (2-3) versus Bad News Spares (0-5): BNS on their way to not making the playoffs, and they don’t care. Pinny Candy on way to 3-3. Here is a poem PayDay wrote to Oolie:
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Oolie you are a fucking tool
And I hate you.
Love is in the air, here is PayDay trying to make it up to Oolie:
Bowlderdash (2-3) -2.5 versus Granola (2-3-1): Granola still trying to recover from that tie. Bowlderdash hoping to Beer Frame Granada Gal, again.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
If you don’t know who Bowlderdash is
Well then, fuck you
Embrace the rage:
Roll Another (4-2) versus Strike City (1-4): Bones says he won’t miss another match all year. Two things about that: nobody cares, and that’s bullshit. Magnus is still looking for that 2 game win streak; it will be awhile.
Roll Another and Strike City sitting in a tree
First comes love
Then comes marriage
Then comes Uncle Buck in a baby carriage.
Here is Uncle Buck arriving for the match:
Late (AKA where the party at):
The party’s where you at right now!
ICBING (3-2) -1 versus Pinups (2-3): Pinups houses two of my favorite ladies in the league. The formidable doubles team of LL Cool Balls. ICBING saw the return of Peanut Gutter last week, and hope to have Sauve Lefty tonight. Riveting.
I gave ICBING a cherry
That had no stone
I gave Pinups a chicken
That had no bone
I gave ICBING a story
That had no end
They gave Pinups a beatdown
That felt like they got it in the rear-end
The return of Sauve Lefty, I feel for Fabio’s guitar:
Party Mix (5-0) -5 versus Five Finger Discount (3-2): Speaking of togas. This could be first real challenge for Mix. Beet and a hot Hakeem (bowling, not looking) should be enough. Slugga will push them for top points.
Take all my loves, my love, yea, take them all:
What hast thou then more than Big Party’s balls?
No love, my love, that thou mayst true love call—
All mine was thine before thou Hakeem this more.
Then if for my love thou my love receivest,
I cannot blame Slugga for my love thou usest;
But yet be blamed if thou this Rufio deceivest
By wilful taste of what thyself refusest.
I do forgive that toga party, gentle thief,
Although thou steal thee all my poverty;
And yet love knows it is a greater grief
To bear love’s wrong than hate’s known injury.
Lascivious grace, in whom all ill well shows,
Kill me with spites, yet we must not be foes.
Hakeem and Big Party at bar after the match:
Strikes of Hazzard (3-3) -11 versus Pin and Juice (1-3-1): Uncle Jesse and crew look to make quick work of C Murda and crew.
O P&J, P&J, wherefore art thou bowloff?
Deny a bowloff and refuse thy name.
Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn a total loser
And I’ll no longer be a Bopoer.
‘Tis but P&J that is my enemy
Here is Hungus to P&J at the Bowling Ball:
Match of the Night:
Lesbowlians (2-3) -2.5 versus HHP (2-3): Two old school fun ass BoPo squads lock horns in this Thursday B side match. Sasha and Tilt will have these teams well prepared for battle.
I’ve held others before,
But it was never like this,
Where my body inhales you
And quivers with bliss,
Where my senses are reeling
From the strength of desire,
And if I can’t have you soon,
Lesbowlians looking to set HHP on Fire.
Doc will try to do better next time. Honestly though looking for folks more in tune to Thursday B than this drunk piss cock is, so hit me up ,if you want to do some (write) lines. And let me stand next to your fire.