The Ghost Of Lines Past

Tuesday A and B March 26, 2024:

Well spring had sprung and then the ghost of Maine winter past was like go on fuck yourself! Perfect Old School Bowl Portland weather to wrap the regular season on one of the toughest patterns in history of Bowl Portland, circa 2008. Buck leading league with a 196.8 tells ya all you need to need. Ghosts of BoPo past tell of one pattern that may have been tougher with Stevie Strikes leading league with something like a 183 average before he got his new chicklets, perfect example of leading league in average and making a difference in the community:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DR7HcqsBOdg

I’ve been at the bar when Munson has that exact look on his face. Always a good time for me. All right let’s get to some Tuesday lines. I must say what in the fuck is up with going to 17 different websites to find all the info needed to craft meaningless self-serving lines! I donated hoping whoever produced this system would invest in cyanide pills. Went looking for a cyanide funny movie scene clip and not only were all the clips devoid of humor. Now I have to be on some “Hello Clarice…” list:

This was me and Hungus the first time we hung out in 2003. Hungus is Jim Carrey.

Early Tuesday A:

Oddballs (9-2) -2.5 versus S.O.D.: Battle of the brothers. Brooklyn recently got employee of the month at Sopo Parks and Rec for firing his idiot brother LL Cool J (Brooklyn’s words not mine, I fancy LL a genius) for doing triple lindys off the swing sets. LL also went butt naked down a wooden slide which resulted in a shit-ton of splinters and was very LL uncool J. That forced Brooklyn’s hand and he had to let his brother go leading to an award. One free coffee and he got to park in the shallow end of the therapy pool for half a week. It’s a 6:30 start so the boys won’t be able to polish off too many twisted teas before they are forced to go in and get a bucket of Mango Trulys that the Heartbreak Kid will likely boof. Danny has
crew primed for another epic run to the finals, and tomorrow they have too much to overcome. Brooklyn just fired LL last thing he is going to do is take an L from the guy. Here is top secret footage of the firing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqQ62B8xdJc

Worst thing is this happy twice. Last time if happened LL went on a penny stock binge. Thank God for DraftKings.

Saucy Posse (7-4) -2 versus Bingas (team of destiny) {4-7}: Jerk rolled in some “pro tourney” this past Sunday and gave away a pendant to person that nailed his 4-game series on the button. Someone nailed it with a 673. Jerk was like sorry it was a tough pattern that’s low for me. 673 is a dream come true for all of us lifetime 150 and under BoPoers. The OG BoPo Ringer frowns upon a 168.3 series. Meanwhile that is right around Cookie’s lifetime average. Full disclosure I guessed 452 and got a middle finger emoji and no pendy. I was close. Walter’s squad is always in it to win since he kicked his entire family off the team other than himself. Saucy actually does have two pro level female matching bowlers on their team
and they are hard to beat. Line is only this close because you know Tso is all jacked up that Trump and Biden are due for another pudding wrestling match. Here is Cookie at one of his kids pre wedding festivals:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k49knyQp8L8

Bingas is game and falls in a close one, makes tourney run as always, don’t forget this team beat a pro team on TV and it literally was like this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skMjcxjrOA8
Excellent shot General T!

LOS (5-6) -1 versus BEER (5-6): You won’t find a more evenly matched game on paper than this. BEER has a team average of 673.4 with a team high if 787, LOS 672.9 with a team high if 765. Lots of history of these teams beating hell out of each other. Multiple folks that will be in their 60s when their kids graduate kindergarten, but one of them is missing so he is bring in a sub with strong LOS ties. His first season in league he choked in playoffs with Precious out of town for work leading TDYOB to make a run to the semis in 2012. Then he made the first PBA Pro Am finals the first-year league play came to Bayside and got killed in finals which led to a TDYOB person getting a PBA Title. Then he provided the tech to one of the greatest bowling podcasts of all time only to get kicked off the pod and disgraced due
to (B)Ass to Mouth having better tech (allegedly). BEER has just been looking to hang out have a few beers and if they happen to win a couple games along the way so be it. Karl Fungus has seen to that. So banished rooftop sessions guys are summoned for Taxi Squad purposes tomorrow. Despite Thunder being a well documented 255 guy, among other things, advantage LOS. Here is Phil Frames shit talking Thunder at bar on Sunday about the match (sidenote-Thunder had no eye deer Phil was on LOS):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FUB8SrlQAE

Bonus clip here is Hungus opening Broadway Bowl:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0rP3UT9MtU

Ouch this will lead to a game 3 benching and no Taxi Squad for Doc!

Sharks and Strikes (5-6) -15 versus Stranger Pins (2-9): Stranger Pins only beats Parks and Rec and is one of main reasons Brooklyn fired and rehired LL. He canned Cool J in a fit of rage after going down to Stranger. Then they got second win over LL and Brooklyn rehired the dude. MacBalls and LLM got these brothers back together and the Employee of the Month stayed intact. Props to stranger making Tuesday A jump and taking out some of these behemoths. If Dick Whitman, that piss drunk cock, is reading these lines he is like what in the hell is a behemoth:

DDJ just traded Roo in for a pale white horse, put they also have the highest game on the year and should make quick work of Stranger Pins. That said the Pins have beaten both teams with the second highest league score on the year, which as we mentioned led to an employee of the month and a brother firing. Here is Brooklyn and LL after LL got hired back:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gmlphWN7Cs

Late Tuesday A:

Waste Management (8-3) +1.5 versus Sweep the Rack (7-4): Trash Island has taken the league by storm in his captaining debut assembling one of the most random and deadliest team of all time. All this team does is win. They carry one of the highest averages in the league and house a team that has only ever seen each other at the lanes. Pale Horse, Fart Nugget (shoutout to Nugget) and 69er have Sweep the Crack flying under the radar ready to pounce on someone come playoff time. I think they start said pouncing tomorrow night on WM. Here is Sweep the Crack getting ready to pounce:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1n9cypaACbA

Have kids they said it will be great.

XXX Club (5-6) -1 versus SKOL (4-7): Watch out for Tango, Roadhead, E Minor, Herk, Koops and Bora these legends don’t quit. Actually, I’m not sure they all are still part of the club. But in my mind, that’s the squad plus Buck. SKOL is a big postseason run away from Viking getting another calf tattoo. Poor guy just lost Kirk Cousins and his QB situation got worst. Here is the best play in the history of his favorite sport franchises existence:

Dude out there making plays costing his team points. I would sign that go long term the next day. Here is Viking after the loss. He is dude in endzone playing the trumpet getting nuked right at the end:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mfebpLfAt8g

BARE (8-3) -1 versus Bowl Trolls (5-6): These are two legendary BoPo squads that get what it is all about and won’t remember where they are when the wake-up Wednesday afternoon. Fuge is top 5 podcast guest of all time and top 17 BoPo shirt maker. Sticky Fingers is not only a drug dealer, but he is a new podcast member. Both making him a big of a Renaissance person. Here he is trying to talk the keglers into giving him and Farmer an outright bid into the doubles tourney:
Good Will Hunting | ‘Retainer’ (HD) – Ben Affleck | MIRAMAX – YouTube
Marblesbee has been crushing pins, Gutterslut and crew will be game but, in the end, they will have to grin and BARE and close loss to Sticky and Crew, Gonna be a fun match to watch.

Minds in Gutter (2-9) versus Burners (2-9) pick em: This has major bowl off potential. Strike Ditka and Spladam are in good company of 140 average bowlers that have a 200 to their name. God damn Dick Strikes of ICBING has 3 200s and a 144.2 average that’s some bad ass ICBING type shit. Sorry just had to mention it. Welchie Saun has a 2hundo of their own. This could be a sneaky battle royale with bowloff implications. If everyone has their best game of the year, we could see some real magic:
Worst Magic Act Ever (youtube.com)
Ran at of time must get to meetings (yes, I have a job) and could no longer find the standings so lightning round:

Onggi -5 versus Big Daddies
Poultry Association +2 versus Incredibowls 11&12 5:30
NED +15 versus Strikes on Tap

Bowl Pack +3 versus Whoomp
Bowling Stones +3 versus TOTY
Brooklyn Hookers -5 versus Wrecking Balls